It is a lovely afternoon here in Warsaw but I’m stuck in my bed due to my sickness. Early in the morning I was utterly bored (I am not a home-person, really) and started thinking about things, small things, silly things. It was one of the times when I just stare at the ceiling and ask myself stupid questions. But strange enough, soon I realized one of the questions I asked myself wasn’t that stupid. It was: “Why am I not blogging anymore?”. I remembered all those times my mother was telling me to write again, or my friends asking me why I stopped. But then, a more serious question popped into my head: “Why did I start?”. And here’s why:
In the beginning of summer 2016, I was alone with my grandparents and I had totally nothing to do except helping my grandmother and just being the “lady of the house”, but it wasn’t enough I needed to, I had to find something else to work on. But this “blogging” wasn’t a new idea for me. I was thinking about blogging for a long time. But I could never find the courage to start. Well, I am going ahead of myself. When I told people, I was going to start a blog, they never believed in me, or told me to concentrate on “more important” things. I remember one time I was talking to a friend of mine and saying that I am planning to start a blog, she laughed. She damn laughed. And it made me furious. I had to show them that I can and I will start a blog, and it will be successful. I honestly was quite dedicated on this idea.
Then, I started the blog. I spent nights writing things, or making plans for my future posts. I was really excited and I was having fun. It was such a good experience for me doing the thing I wanted to do for a long time. To be honest, I didn’t have much readers, I still don’t. But, each and every reader was important to me because it meant that they cared about my opinions, or simply because they were curious.
I don’t quite remember what made me stop or why I went along with the idea of stopping but I always regret that. I think I was dealing with some visa stuff and I was busy, but still can it be counted as an excuse? No! No way! I believe that mistakes are proof that we are learning. And I learned that if you really want something and you finally get it, you should stick to it.
Coming back to the question I asked myself today: “Why am I not blogging anymore?” I decided to turn it into the statement: “Starting today, I will blog.” I hope it will be a long period of dedication this time J
Who knows, maybe someday I will ask myself “What makes me keep going?” 😉
Thank you for reading this, and more blog posts are on the way.